I’ve noticed a worrying trend amongst the stamped-out-carbon-copy-youths that parade around Nottingham.

In the last few weeks I’ve seen at least three young ladies wearing large black framed glasses.

What’s so wrong about that you might ask? Nothing I might answer – after all I’m afflicted by bad eyesight myself – these young ladies are obviously suffering from some type of deficiency in the vision stakes. You might then go on to say; yeah, you need to button it mate. To which I may possibly respond; how could I have been so…

Hang on!

There are no lenses in the frames!

That’s right, the imaginary dialogue played out above would be completely moot, the dizzy bints all had one thing in common, their glasses had no glass. What is the point of that?

I know I’m slowly becoming a bit of a curmudgeon but really, no lenses? Since when has it been cool to parade around dressed like a bag of cloth samples, wearing a corrective appliance for an imaginary handicap?

What’s next neck braces? Callipers?

Am I to expect to see a group of emo youths hysterically propelling themselves towards Rock City in wheelchairs, their spindly little arms frantically pushing at their wheels?

Will I witness herds of illiterate, badly coiffured, androgynous boys fiddling with imaginary hearing aids and talking like deaf people in the Market Square?

This is a slippy slope my friends, mark my words, a slippy slope.